It’s a pandemic! I see it in comments sections everywhere, even in small, local online forums. From a Chinese Medicine perspective, being a d*ck to strangers on the internet is known to be harmful to health. In fact, this form of aggression indicates a disease pattern that can cause a host of other health issues.
Why You Should Be Kind to Strangers: a Chinese Medicine Perspective
Being a d*ck to strangers on the internet is an expression of a Liver* disharmony. In Chinese Medicine, the Liver system regulates the flow of energy throughout the body and in the proper direction, and this includes emotional regulation.
When someone experiences emotions and fails to manage and process them appropriately (and instead lashes out at a stranger, for example), these emotions begin to block the flow of energy throughout the body. Once energy is blocked, heat builds up, and- just like the heat that builds with friction- it can start fires. Speaking or acting in anger and lashing out at others contributes to this fire, like throwing on extra fuel.
The Disease Pattern: Liver Imbalance
This disease pattern in Chinese Medicine can be referred to as Liver Depression Qi Stagnation with Depressive Heat, or sometimes Liver Qi Stagnation with Liver Heat (or Fire). It can spread to other organ systems, eventually affecting the Heart, Stomach, and Lungs.
This is a cause of or contributing factor for many health issues, including (but certainly not limited to): high blood pressure; headaches or migraines; insomnia, nightmares, or night sweats; acne, shingles outbreaks, rashes, and other skin conditions; GERD (acid reflux and heartburn); constipation, hemorrhoids, or bloody stools; eye redness, itching, swelling, and/or pain; anxiety; consistent anger, frustration, and difficulty coping with emotions; and so much more.
The energy blockages caused by holding onto feelings of anger, dwelling, raging, and otherwise inappropriately managing emotions, can also cause energy (or qi) to move in the wrong direction throughout the body. At this point, the Liver is no longer doing it’s job of regulating qi. It’s as if the qi comes up against a blockade, and has to turn around and travel back where it came from. This can cause symptoms such as burping and acid reflux when it affects the Stomach (whose energy is supposed to descend), or a hacking cough when it affects the Lungs (whose energy also descends in good health). In these circumstances, the pattern might be called “Liver Attacking Lungs”, for example.
IBS Can Be Related to Aggression or Poor Emotional Management
A very common pattern I regularly see in clinic is “Liver Attacking Spleen”. When this occurs, people may experience symptoms such as alternating loose stools and constipation (or stools that resemble little pellets), gas, bloating, poor appetite, nausea, and fatigue. This set of symptoms often correlates with a diagnosis of IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome – a very fitting name). In Chinese Medicine, the Spleen system is integral to assimilating nutrients and building blood and qi so that you have plenty of energy and vitality. When it’s impaired by the Liver as a result of anger, frustration, and rage, your quality of life ultimately suffers.
Next time you see someone being a d*ck on the internet, you can imagine they’ve got at least a handful of these symptoms, and maybe a future of heart disease if they don’t turn it around. (These patterns can be treated with behavioural and lifestyle changes, dietary changes, acupuncture, and herbs!) Respond with kindness anyways, or don’t respond at all- for your own health.
Techniques to Cool Down Frustration & Deflect Aggression from Others
Rude or aggressive remarks from strangers can affect you in the same way, so it’s important to learn how to cool off or relax and let go after these interactions. I’ll share a meditation tool you can use to stay calm or return to a peaceful state if you’ve been unsettled or upset by out-of-the-blue aggression from a stranger, or if you’re feeling aggressive yourself.
If visualization exercises are challenging for you, experiencing the actual element of water with your body is a great place to start. Choose one of these meditation techniques, with the goal of learning to visualize the water without having to take a shower.
- Take a cool(ish) shower and imagine you’re cleansing yourself of the words and their impact, or whatever is affecting you specifically. Let the words fall, “like water off a duck’s back”, as they say.
There are lots of idioms about letting things go that focus on water. Another example is, “it’s water under the bridge.” Anger corresponds to fire element, so it makes sense to use the water element to control it, à la the 5 Elements Cycle in Chinese Medicine. You don’t have to take a physical shower to feel this letting go or coming out a cool, clean, calm you. You can also visualize it, which brings me to:
- Sit or stand comfortably with your hands by your sides or on your thighs. Visualize a cool shower or gentle waterfall pouring over your head, running down your back, arms, and chest. Imagine it running over your closed eyelids and spouting off your nose and chin. Visualize how the water would really feel. It’s temperature, it’s pressure, how fast it’s moving, where it travels, and where it falls off your body and runs down the drain or stream. Imagine it loosening anything that’s attached to you and washing it away. Some people like to imagine that their skull is open at the top, and the water runs through their mind. Whatever works for you, works.
Do not enter rage spiral. Go straight to option 1 or 2. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200. Getting worked up is throwing more fuel on the fire. This can have the same health impacts as being a d*ck to strangers on the internet! If you vent (too much) in anger to others, you can spread your fire. This pattern is, in a way, contagious.
If you hold on to these thoughts and feelings, they can harm you. Learning to let them go is valuable. Acupuncture and herbology can also support you and your body in this ongoing process of learning and practicing emotional regulation.
*In Chinese Medicine, “Liver” does not refer to your literal liver organ alone, and a Liver-related TCM disease doesn’t mean you have a biomedical liver disease.
*In Chinese Medicine, each symptom is referred to as its own “disease”.
If you know someone (such as yourself!) who experiences this, acupuncture can help. Book an appointment today! To learn more about acupuncture and Chinese Medicine, visit the Peony Tree Medicine website.
